And very often, it is! Says a young woman corporate employee, “There is a certain power dynamic with straight men that women don’t experience with gay men. And so, women are always wary of their friendliness being misinterpreted as flirtation or sexual interest. Most women believe that heterosexual men are attracted to all women in varying degrees, and look at them as potential mates.
He argues that straight women trust gay men more “due to the absence of deceptive mating motivations that frequently taint their relationships with straight men (sexual interest) and other straight women (mate competition).”Ī woman engages more openly and intimately with a gay man because she can totally be herself - laugh out loud, look him straight in the eye, share some poetry and say just about anything with no fear that he may misinterpret a smile, a laugh, or a shared joke for anything but what it is. Psychologist Eric Russell of Texas Christian University claims that the age-old relationship between the homosexual male and the heterosexual female serves a biologically adaptive function. Fourth, a woman hanging out with a gay friend – whether both are single, married or in a partnership – is not judged as she may be when she hangs out with a straight man. In fact, studies show that women prefer hiring gay men over straight men. Third, since gay men have no qualms giving in to their feminine side – as opposed to straight men who are rigidly macho – it is easier for women to connect on several more levels. Even better, this man and this woman are not competing for the same men. Second, a woman feels safer, knowing for sure she is not being targeted or wooed. Why is that so? For one, with a gay man there are no taboo subjects or fear of being misunderstood.
Movies, books and web series – not to forget real life - are replete with instances of deep and close friendships between straight women and gay men. However, gay men are often the best friends a woman can find. Truly comfortably platonic friendships that are without undercurrents are rare between the two sexes. Both are either trying to convey a sexual interest or trying to gauge if the other side has any - or even trying hard to establish that there is none. An ambiguous, awkward sexual tension that underlies such interactions.
Free of sexual tensions and mate-competitive behaviour, straight women and gay men are the greatest mates ever!Īdmit it or not, but whenever a man and woman interact, there is a frisson of awareness between them.